Burpees, Bullsh*t, and Misunderstood Fitness Standards
Let’s get something straight right out of the gate:
All exercises are made up.
There’s no divine scroll of “correct” movements. Someone, at some point, put together a movement pattern and said, “This works.” Over time, different communities adapted, scaled, and evolved those movements to fit their goals. That includes burpees.
So let’s talk about them, and all the confusion, gatekeeping, and bad takes that come with them.
The Burpee Isn’t Sacred. It’s Functional.
The burpee most people learned in school is more or less a squat-thrust with a push-up baked in. Your gym teacher probably made you:
- Drop into a tall plank
- Perform a full push-up
- Jump feet back up (while putting your knees and ankles into a compromised position, especially for those who lacked mobility).
- Leap into the air and clap
But in the functional fitness world, especially in CrossFit, Hyrox and similar methodologies, burpees are performed differently, and intentionally so:
- Drop down quickly
- Chest and thighs hit the ground
- Pop back up
- Small jump and clap overhead
This isn’t sloppy. It’s efficient. It’s scalable. And it’s been a gold standard in conditioning work for over 15 years.
The goal here is cyclical output, not push-up virtuosity. You’re training metabolic capacity, pacing under fatigue, coordination, and the ability to hit the ground and get up repeatedly, not auditioning for a textbook.
What Is a Burpee For?
Most online critics don’t stop to ask what the purpose of the exercise is. That’s where all the bad takes start.
In conditioning workouts, burpees are used to:
- Raise heart rate quickly
- Train recovery between reps
- Reinforce a pattern of safely hitting the ground and getting up
- Bridge movement patterns without equipment
Think real world: you fall hiking, wipe out playing a sport, or get tackled. Burpees build the capacity to get back up fast, over and over. That’s valuable.
Strict burpees (rigid body, controlled push-up, slower pacing) absolutely have value too, especially in strength-based circuits. But they are a different movement serving a different purpose.
Why the “That’s Not a Real Burpee” Crowd is Wrong
Here’s the thing: there is no universal burpee definition. There are dozens of variations, including:
- Strict burpee: With a formal push-up
- CrossFit burpee: Chest/thighs to ground, bounce up
- Sprawl burpee (often seen in combat sports): Fast down-up, no jump
- Box burpee: Jump onto a box
- Over-object burpee: Lateral hop or jump over a barbell
Every one of these has a reason to exist.
The internet critics love to gatekeep based on whatever version they were first taught, usually without context. Just because your coach in 2007 said, “Only chest, toes, and hands touch the ground,” doesn’t mean every other approach is invalid.
What you’re seeing in functional fitness-style workouts is not flopping around. It’s a controlled sprawl built for repeatability and intensity.
Let’s Talk About Efficiency
In a workout with dozens or hundreds of reps, doing a slow, rigid push-up for each burpee would be:
- Time-consuming
- Shoulder-fatiguing
- Counterproductive to the conditioning stimulus
It’s not about cheating. It’s about applying the right tool for the job. If a workout has push-ups and burpees, you don’t want to double up unnecessarily.
In fact, forcing a strict push-up into a burpee workout designed for conditioning can:
- Shift the intended training effect
- Increase shoulder wear
- Reduce movement quality under fatigue
So when someone online insists, “That’s not a real burpee,” what they’re often doing is imposing their rigid view onto a context they don’t understand.
The Guy in Your Comments Section
Let’s address the kind of comment that sparked this whole conversation:
“Hey man, I love your workouts. I just think your burpee form is poor. The body should be rigid, core engaged, like a proper push-up… not flopping on the floor.”
Cool. Respectfully: you’re wrong.
The burpee being demonstrated is a deliberate movement style. It’s not poor form, it’s the appropriate form for the intent of the session. It’s built on:
- Thousands of reps
- Years of programming knowledge
- A conditioning-first goal
If you want to do your reps strict, you’re welcome to. But don’t confuse a different standard for a better one.
Why Context Always Wins
This isn’t just about burpees. It’s about understanding that movement standards change depending on context:
- Olympic lifting vs bodybuilding
- Powerlifting vs functional strength
- Rehab vs performance training
Trying to apply the rules of one setting to another just shows you don’t get the framework.
Before you jump in with a critique, ask:
- What’s the purpose of the movement?
- What’s the goal of the workout?
- What audience is this for?
If you can’t answer those, you shouldn’t be making sweeping claims about someone’s form.
Final Word
There is no true burpee. There are just different burpees for different goals.
If you’re doing a strength circuit and want clean reps with strict control? Great. Do your push-ups. If you’re hammering through a conditioning workout that calls for speed, repeatability, and flow? Sprawl-style burpees are exactly what you need.
Next time someone complains that a burpee “isn’t real,” ask them what the goal is. If they can’t answer that, you already won the argument.
Train smart. Understand context. And stop trying to police a movement you clearly don’t get.
PS: Don’t even get us started on kipping pull-ups ;)
What’s your burpee style? Are you team “strict form with perfect push-ups” or do you embrace the efficient sprawl? Have you ever been form-policed on your burpees?
Drop a comment below and let’s discuss. We read every single one and love hearing about your burpee experiences (and horror stories). 👇
